[As an aside, the whispers stop when you turn up the volume on your headphones. Somebody and I'm not naming names decided to move the sliders on the computer's volume interface. Did you know that BBC's World Service Podcast at really low volumes sounds like a horde of demons with British accents? Some people get voices in their heads telling them to go on rampages. I get demons obsessed with soccer. But I digress.]
Costco, or you just wanted to get rid of the 2nd item from that 2 for 1 deal, you could put it on the Vulture Table. Anyone in the office could take as much as they like from the Vulture Table, up to and including the whole thing (though you would get funny looks if you took the remains of a sheet cake back to your desk).
I seek shelter beneath an overpass, but I and six other "NonEssentials" are kicked out by a dozen funded employees of the Department of Transportation. When the gov't starts back up, they'll open the overpass to the vagrants and homeless again. This is annoying, as we beat those bums in a rumble fair and square. Doubly annoying as I was hoping for more liver from my fellow NonEssentials. They were going to have to sleep at some point.
through a lot, but managed to survive using six sigma techniques and a crowbar to get through the door. They were a sorry lot. Frightened. Confused. Unsure of their agenda for their next staff meeting. Tragic figures in a world gone mad. The days are becoming shorter but feel longer. There is an itch in the back of my mind, brought on by the absence of something I had taken for granted. Living in the DC area has made me soft. I haven't had a fix in days and I'm starting to feel the symptoms. I always thought I could quit whenever I wanted. In the next few days, my body will tell me if I was correct or just fooling myself.
The Shutdown DiaryDay Two of the Shutdown. The lack of an undersecretary for public relations has forced me to issue my own press releases. Reception has been mixed, as most of the people who read them are also deemed non essential". While wandering the wastelands, I stumbled across a small group of refugees from the Department of Education's Office of Diversity Enrichment. They were huddled in the snack bar of a closed park, burning post it notes for warmth. They had been Air Max 90 All Black
lunch at my desk? Do I document this now or after unit testing? Should we hit this house with a drone strike or simple artillery? I miss the sense of relief when I committed to a decision. The simple joy of typing in method annotations or filling out the strike package paperwork. They were a simple pleasure at work and had the added bonus of making the voices stop their whispering for a time.
On the positive side, the rain on my face is pleasant and cooling this October of Global Warming. Having to stay off the federally funded highways is annoying, and I am forced to risk the packs of looters and cannibals on the surface streets. I dart from landscaped clumps of bushes to telephone poles, warily searching for danger. It's a tense day, but the light rain aids my stealth and refreshes my soul. It makes squishy noises in my shoes, makes my scalp cool and washes the blood of the hobos off my hands and clothing. I look back upon my life two weeks ago and I find myself missing the stress of making decisions. Sure, I complained at the time and spent the workday a nervous ball of frustrated energy. my coworkers could recognize the signs and learned to "Stay away from Darkmage on his rabies days" and all that. I would have pulled my hair out except for hair and I parted ways a few years ago.
Regular gerbil and frequent R contributor Darkmage was affected by the now ended gov't shutdown. After requesting and receiving permission from Darkmage, we've taken several posts and turned it into a single document and brought it here to the 'Porch.
Those were intense, but fun days. We have a tradition at the office of the "Vulture Table". If at any time you brought in too much food, or had a birthday where your team didn't consume an entire sheet cake from Nike Air Max 90 Trainers
I've gathered the pets together in the dinning room to discuss our plans for raking the leaves. It's not the same, but maybe it will do. The rains have started. Water now collects upon the roof because the gov't has not inspected the gutters to make sure they are up to code. The lawn is drinking in the unregulated runoff in flagrant violation of federal guidelines. I can't tell yet, it's probably acidic due to nobody enforcing pollution standards and will eat through a roof in a matter of hours.
The Vulture Table has given me an idea. I'm taking a fold up table out to Rock Creek Park today. There's a pack of HR managers from the Dept. of Commerce that have taken refuge in the trees there and I've been trying to get them for days. I'm going to set up the table under a tree and it being Wednesday, I'll be using bagels and donuts as bait. When they come for the free donuts, I shall pounce!
Oh god, I haven't had a project meeting in almost a week! I think about them constantly. I am not yet experiencing the DTs, but I sense them lurking ahead like a forest fire over the next hill. I hunger for the comfort of ugly office furniture and too stiff mass produced gray fabric chairs. Throughout the day, I smell the white board markers at random times and I catch myself planning LOE estimates on cooking rice.
I miss the Vulture Table. Occasionally, a team would order a deli platter or pizza and I could swipe enough to go without lunch. I picked up Air Max 90 Black Essential a pound of pumpkin spice coffee once. Good times.
It'd be really nice if the comments stayed away from R The first hint of it and this gets locked. I was going to lock it from the start but I have this silly belief in gerbils doing the right thing. That said, here we go:
Darkmage's Shutdown Diary
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